So you've been banned?
Hi!
Just to get that out of the way:
Yes, I suck. I am terrible person. I am evil, vile, and manipulative.
An undeserved autocrat incapable of communication.
You're probably here because you were banned and your emotions are completely warranted.
No one should be forced to deal with someone like me.
In fact, I wouldn't want to deal with myself either.
What an insane amount of work for some stupid robot vacuum that is supposed to just work.
Here's how you can get rid of me and strip me of all my dictatorial might:
Channel those emotions and contact the vendor of your Vacuum Robot.
You could for example:
- Write them a Mail.
- Call them.
- Start a demonstration in front of their HQ.
- Go to your local dealership and put up small signs warning other customers that the device bought will not be owned.
- Go into hunger strike.
I bet you can come up with even more ideas than the idiot that is me could ever do.
You have so much creative potential. Use it! Turn that anger into motivation!
Let us not fight about a tiny cake. Let's make that cake bigger!
So big that my sorry ass becomes irrelevant.
I just parasitically sit here, because I inserted me into the sorry vendor situation to benefit from it;
Purely motivated by ego and monetary reasons.
Put me in my place!
Change the world and make what I do irrelevant!
Uh.. okay?
Yes! With that out of the way, here are some common hints:
When you can't join the support group, first make sure that your screen name is set, has more than two real letter characters and is sane.
Something like Zalgo will get you removed by the automod. Same goes for e.g. "." as the username, as that breaks the moderation tools.
If your messages keep vanishing, chances are that that's also the automod. The code and with that its ruleset is available on GitHub:
https://github.com/Hypfer/easterwave
If it's not the screen name/username nor the automod, it might've been me.
In that case, refer to:
- The Code of Conduct
- Why not Valetudo?
- The FAQ
- The Contributing.md
- Your local priest
Generally speaking, the rules and communication are like this for a reason.
Thus, approaching them with the mindset of "I am the exception" is a surefire way to get banned.
Current WR speedrun strats include "I know the official stance is, but", "I have this robot that is not listed as supported, but", "Cool project, thanks! When can we get X", "Hello I am new and I believe this is all wrong. Instead, you should" and "Check out this marketing material of a new vacuum robot launch".
It is possible and likely that your intent was misunderstood; either by me or maybe also by yourself.
This is one of the many downsides of the ruthless push for efficiency in our current world.
Most bans in my space expire after a while, because I firmly believe that few things are final and it can always get better.
Some are permanent, though. Though, the CoC does leave the possibility of an appeal if you can find it.
Rest assured, I absolutely fucking hate this role and would love nothing more than not having to play it.
None of the alternatives I saw so far (and I saw many) do seem to be viable/sane though, so it is what it is.
Would be cool if we could just all get along and be happy little hackers.
Addendum: Where to go from here?
Okay, so. You're banned. What now?
Is it even worth bothering?
First of all: who cares.
You still have your rooted robot, the Valetudo source code and all the public docs available to you.
Everything is still there just the way it was 30 seconds ago.
Do you even need to be unbanned? What for?
To interact with me who just banned you?
Why would you want that?
Evidently, I'd just ban you instead of do what you'd want me to do, so getting unbanned likely just leads to getting instantly rebanned.
When exactly do non-permanent bans expire?
Depends.
The average duration is probably a bit below 1 year, which is the maximum the Telegram API allows for a non-permanent ban.
This is - effectively - still permanent, because the person that got banned will never get back in. Whoever grew out of that person next year however might.
I have occasionally experimented with shorter bans and/or mutes, but those usually lasted for 30 minutes tops before the person exploded further and thus got banned further.
That was kinda sad honestly. But also kinda to be expected. Anyway, that's why it's usually 1 year, because if it isn't, it will be 30 minutes later + double the time investment.
As said further up, some bans do not expire on their own. This is determined case-by-case based on how little faith I have in meaningful growth happening within that 1 year timespan.
You cannot see how long your ban will last, but others can. As for why it happened, you can probably find that in your heart! (Seriously though, a lot of people that get banned seem to instantly know precisely why they got banned. The only missing link there is between knowledge and acting accordingly.)
What should I do?
I don't really care what you do, but I can tell you what you should not do.
You should not instantly contact me, stating that you've been banned and that you're unhappy about that.
You should also not come back with a multiaccount.
You should not write me emails, open GitHub issues or DM other of my accounts with requests to be unbanned.
You should not try to bargain, pressure or leverage yourself into getting unbanned. This just gets you permabanned.
The leverage part really is just disgusting tbh.
Keep those dangling carrots for yourself and/or at your (likely corporate (and terrible)) workplace. Thank you.
You should also not contact me with "I have read the rules and don't see the issue. Now you explain to me in great detail what I did wrong".
That too just gets you permabanned. Do your own homework.
Essentially, you should not run a try-harder loop.
Doing the same thing again and expecting different results is - by definition - insanity.
So what should you do?
Read the docs, probably.
Possibly pull yourself out of terrible employment/relationship/family/etc. situations that might be trickling down toxicity into your daily life.
(Seriously. This is a cloud replacement for vacuum robots. Vacuum cleaners, dude. All those emotions are not coming from here.)
Possibly just become a person that can confidently say that their net impact on the world is a positive one.
Or just do none of the above, use the public documentation, the public source code and not care about my ramblings.
That's certainly the easiest and maybe even the most healthy option.
Someone angry about Valetudo not being "democratic FOSS" once called it "Use-Only Software". So maybe that's the solution.
Treat Valetudo as use-only. Like literally any other piece of software.